…Because of idiots like Sky commentators Andy Gray and Richard Keys.  Before yesterday’s Liverpool-Wolves match, the microphones caught them making some unsavory comments about the female linesman and West Ham vice-chairman Karren Brady.

This from the Daily Mail:

Commenting on [Linesman Sian] Massey, Mr Keys said, “Somebody better get down there and explain offside to her.”

Mr. Gray, a former Scottish international footballer, replied,  “Can you believe that?  A female linesman.  Women don’t know the offside rule.”

Mr. Keys replied,  “Course they don’t.  I can guarantee you there will be a big one today.  Kenny (Liverpool manager Kenny Dalglish) will go potty.  This isn’t the first time, is it?  Didn’t we have one before?”

Later in the exchange, Mr. Keys said,  “The game’s gone mad.  Did you hear charming Karren Brady this morning complaining about sexism?  Do me a favor, love.”

You can hear the audio here.

Besides being blatantly sexist, the true damage of these remarks is that now everyone will remember Ms. Massey for her role in this controversy, rather than the excellent officiating job she did.  She nailed every call spot on, most notably the big decision on whether Raul Meireles was onside in creating Liverpool’s opening goal.  The performance she had yesterday was higher than most referees in the Premier League, regardless of sex– but nobody will remember that now.

I hope you’ll join me in following this story with great interest.  Imagine what would happen to Keys and Gray if their remarks had been racist?  They’d be canned, tarred and feathered, and slandered in the press by black players and pundits claiming the pair are the biggest bane to the sport since Stalin sent some of the world’s best players to gulag.

But it’s only a little sexism, so Keys and Gray will probably only get fined and issue the standard rambling apology.  Maybe be given a weekend leave to play golf instead of heehaw through a Premiership matchday.

I suppose that’s the norm when the President of FIFA thinks female players ought to dress a little sexier.

Glad to see Keys and Gray have come a long way since these days.

Gerard Pique has recently spoken to the press to deny that he’s the reason for Shakira’s breakup with longtime boyfriend Antonio de la Rua.  This of course leads one to question Mr. Pique, “Um, nobody ever said they thought that… but now we sure do.”

Pique, who met Shakira on set for the “Waka Waka” video, says the pair are “just friends.”  Pretty original, Gerard.  But I’m from the Biz Markie school of thought, “So please listen to the message that I send/Don’t ever talk to a girl who says she just has a friend.”

Of course, maybe this is a giant smokescreen for the Ibra Incident…

Ring a ding ding!  We have a new contender for “Worst Miss Ever,” albeit a different take from the usual open net scuffers.  Sign him up, Roy.  He’ll fit right in…

*****

On an unrelated, but totally thematically-related note:  is it any coincidence that yesterday as a David Beckham move to Tottenham seemed imminent, they lose a Premier League game for the first time since November 6?  Talk about your all time backfires.

Since leaving Manchester United in 2003, Becks has played for Real Madrid, LA Galaxy, AC Milan, and (of course) England.  Here’s everything he’s won in that time– one La Liga title (2006-2007).  That’s it.  It’s like the guy has become allergic to winning since Fergie kicked him in his head.  If he goes to Spurs, I’d bet my pony on them finishing outside of the top four.

…Sign him up, Roy.

Tags: Beckham, Miss, Tottenham